!!! BREAKING NEWS !!!

MEGAWULF FOUND GUILTY ON SEVERAL HUNDRED COUNTS OF CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY
SLATED FOR PUBLIC EXECUTION VIA STARVATION

     It was 4 am and Crash was sound asleep, dreaming of a glock toting neph gang dominating new-gen losers in PB2 once more as they used to. On his face shined a smile that lit up the room but then… 

 

     Tayy comes bursting into the room, lights on and screaming! Crash awoke with a sudden startle, he glances about the room as his eyes attempt to readjust. When he finally gathers his composure, he bears witness to one of his most trusted Discordian addicts on the floor, knees glued and hands held tightly together. 

 

     Crash is obviously bothered by this. He states firmly:
          “What in the fuck do you think you’re doing bitch nigga?”

     Tayy begins to beg relentlessly to allow Blackbird back into his server for the 5th time this week. Crash explains to Tayy that Blackbird is a smug bitch every time he DMs him and is not worthy of joining his server full of cock-riding dickwads. 

 

     “Besides, he probably won’t even join anyways. He always says no then asks to rejoin like 10 weeks later after the offer is up, he’s such a faggot” Crash explains. 

Megawulf sends the COVID-19 virus into hiding as the micro-organisms think he will devour them in one swift gulp, much like how Blue Whales eat microscopic Plankton

     As the two go back and forth, a doped up Temagami steps in accompanied by none other than Lowel. They await patiently for Crash to acknowledge their presence. Crash then proceeds to effectively silence Tayy in such rapid fasion before addressing the two. 

 

     “We finally got him, we got that sick bastard” stated Temagami. Crash needed not another word to be said, he already knew who it was they spoke of.

 

     At long last, Megawulf had been captured. Megawulf had spent the last 3 years in hiding by simply dawning a mustache he bought at the dollar store with money won in a raffle at his local Library. He didn’t even need to stop acting like Megawulf or doing everything Megawulf did, the mustache hid all. 

 

     “W-we put a trap in place. A simple one, all we did was put a plate of food inside an oversized industrial truck. You know, the kind they transport large aircraft around in. It was a tight fit but he squeezed himself in, he really wanted that corn.” exclaimed Temagami. 

Megawulf would be prominently featured as a later DLC character, in which you try to get 1st on like, 20 accounts but never make 1st on any of them.

     Megawulf would receive no trial. It was obvious to everyone that Megawulf was guilty of, like, 1000 counts of pedophilia. He had groomed some little girl and had been caught on several occasions in possession of Stephen Universe pornography, of which he was even banned from Twitter for before. He had tried to hire Serpent & Blackbird to hack Sasuke after his legendary “Megawulf Diss Track” released for the multi-award winning PS3 AAA game “PB2: Legendary Addict Edition”

     This isn’t all, though. Some new-gen chubby asian guy calling himself the “PewDiePie of PB2” decided that he has had enough of this individual as well. 

 

     It was late one night when GoldenKnife’s girlfriend was nagging him as usual. In a very brief short flash of mid-life crisis; despite being only like, 17 or something; GoldenKnife decided something needed to be done about “Demon Legend” after being harassed late one night by a semi-hungry Megawulf fiending for only the youngest of online girls he could find and all the attention he could get from anyone, negative or positive. 

 

     He sprung from his chair and leaped toward the closet! His girlfriend could not believe her eyes, never has she seen such wardrobe finesse. It has not even been 2 seconds since he left his chair that, now, is already wearing the longest trench coat any nigga will have ever done seen, ever. I dare not forget the shady fedora, either. 

 

     As his girlfriend’s, sister’s, mom’s, whatever the fuck you wish to call her; jaw dropped to the floor as they could not even begin to believe what their eyes were being exposed to, GoldenKnife proceeded to loudly proclaim that he would devote his entire life to toppling Megawulf’s criminal empire if that’s what it took. 

     Well as he knows now… it only took about 35 seconds. Megawulf’s mustache didn’t hide as much as he thought it did.

 

          The end…. yes? Probably not. This fatass fucktarded piece of inhumane headass, school-zone banned, drooling at the mouth dickwad is just gonna go into “hiding” under another persona. Watch him amass another army of lied to 15 year olds to mass report my videos again only to still not even remotely succeed in any way, shape or form. Watch out Goldenknife, he does that.  Aight I’m done typing, fuck off now weirdo.